hi
i am up writing this because i'm worried about you. i too have noticed changes that seem to make it clearer that you are getting 'elevated'..... you know that i have a broader view than many about what constitutes 'mental illness' and what might be described as a heightened creative state, but given what i know of your long-term story i think i have to tell you when i see signs of things that might be detrimental to your well being.
i think the email from your friend tom was not unreasonable, he was very specific and not attacking you personally, rather listing things that have happened. you have also described to me several 'encounters' in the last few weeks that involve increasing and inappropriate levels of aggression. i really don't think the thing on the bus would have happened even a month ago.
the main thing that tells me something is amiss is that during our MUCH TREASURED conversations it really feels like you are less and less able to listen well and more and more led by needing to do all the talking, sometimes off topic (even by my extremely meandering standards ;-) ).
this is not the person i know and love, who is pretty much the best listener i have ever met. well, it is of course, deep down, in your good good heart. but i just wanted to check in with you about the changes i see because i care very much about your well being.
i am truly sorry if my actions have contributed to or triggered distress in any way. i am so so sorry if i let you down or have made you feel bad.
i hope we can talk this weekend.
much much much love
